Monday, April 23, 2012

A guest post by the kid himself.

I'm not gonna lie. My kid makes me laugh. Sometimes cry, but mostly laugh.

They are ending the school year with an animal research project. If there's one thing you should know about my kid? Animals have been his "thing" since birth.

At the age of 5 he declared that he would be a marine biologist. Around the same time we had taken a spring break trip to the St. Louis area. Naturally, having a kid so into animals, the zoo was high on the list of places to go.

The day we went to the zoo, it was if we had our our tour guide. Our own 5 year old tour guide. It was really the first time I thought "Um. huh. This kid knows a lot about animals."

At one point we were walking past this sculpture and I commented "That's an odd looking bug"

My son then said matter of factly "Oh, that's a giant stag beetle also known as an elephant beetle.."

He then may have said a few other facts about this bug but I didn't hear him because I was too busy picking up my jaw.

It doesn't surprise me that this research project is perfect for him. It's what he does naturally on his own anyways. Unfortunately, all this natural knowledge has led him to this situation:

( I asked him to write his story-below)

Okay, so I have to do this research thing in school, and uh, well basically EVERY single thing I searched for on countless sites on the computer said something like this: No matches were found for your search, double check your spelling. Another example is “Animal unknown, search something else”, just to name a few.

B’s logical list of animals he tried to search up on the sites he used
1. My 1st try was the highfin lizardfish.
2. Next was the lizardfish
3. I did the dumbo octopus too.
4. Then I did the bonefish (cool name, so I thought I would attempt it)
5. I also tried the squat lobster
6. The vent crab was next
7. The tubeworm
8. And last, the giant ostr(I don’t know whether the next letter is a u,o,a, or I, so I’ll take a guess) ocod.

As I searched up these fish, I raised my hand. A teacher came over and said, “What do you need?”

I said, “How do you spell this?”

The teacher replied, “What the heck are you trying to spell there”, pointing to the giant ostr (The a,I,o, or u dilemma came up again)ocod.

I said, THAT’S why I’m asking you!!!!!”

She said, “why don’t search up something more common?”

“Everything COMMON I know about!!!!”

She said, “why don’t you search up something less exotic then??”

“Everything LESS EXOTIC I know too much about so there’s no point of researching it!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!”

“Well, you’re going to have to think of something.” And she walked away.

In line, I talked about how I searched on 7,000,000,000 sites, and 0 animal-related links came up. The teacher then sent me to the school library (Okay, before you continue reading, start singing the movie JAWS theme song, and when you get to the final note, read the next part) to pick up an animal book of my interest. So I searched, and I found a manatee book. Hopefully I’ll find a better subject. Hopefully.

I have to admit. My favorite part about his story is him sticking up for himself and not giving into just researching any old thing.

I volunteered to go into the class to help kids research on Thursday. I have a feeling I know who I'll be helping.

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