Last night I had Kindergarten orientation for my younger
son. It was hard not to reflect back on
my first time through this with B. I
remember looking around the room at the information on the walls. I had that sinking feeling of “he’s not going
to like this.” Not because he didn’t
like to learn. It was quite the
opposite. Based on the curriculum
presented, he had already surpassed the “required” knowledge needed for that
year.
But this time was different.
T just turned 5 in June. There
were thoughts of holding him back a year.
There were discussions with teachers.
There were tough internal questions to ask.
T was born on June 19th, 2007. He was 3 weeks early and weighed 5lbs 5
oz. He was like a little bird when he
was born. He didn’t “unfold” himself
until about his actual due date. Even at
only 3 weeks early, you could just tell, he wasn’t done cooking. He let
us know that he wasn’t done for the next
6 months with colic and a side of reflux.
Then, something changed.
He went mute. Hearing the colic
for the previous 6 months, I wasn’t sure if I should jump for joy, or if there
was something more to this silence.
At his next well doctor visit, it was determined with the
developmental delays in conjunction with the regression in speech, he would be
evaluated for early intervention.
Without going into everything, because that’s like 5 posts
in itself, I still decided in the end not to hold him back from attending kindergarten
this year. Even though he’s only been in
school for 3 days, the decision weighs on my mind constantly. At orientation last night, just hearing about
the reading, writing, and journaling, my stomach sank again. This time for different reasons.
The main reasons people hold children back a year are: emotional, social, cognitive, or sports
related.
My son had attended 2 years of preschool and is very social
and has no issues separating from me. He is independent, friendly, social, and well
behaved. I’m not concerned with the sports reason. He is of average height and weight and is
much more coordinated than his older brother already. So the only reason left was his cognitive
abilities.
I already had a child who went into school knowing “everything”
he needed to. Let me tell you, that was
no treat either.
If I had based my decision on the educational component
alone, I would have held him back. Though,
he has no diagnosed learning disability as of right now, I know that this year (and
future years) of learning will be a challenge.
He will have to work harder than his brother ever had to.
So should I have held him back and have him start next year with “less”
to learn or do I offer him everything to learn this year.
I chose everything. I believe, school should be filled with exciting discovery and full of new
information.
I hope I gave him that.
I’ll still
debate it every day. That’s just what Mom’s do.
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(Since I do have 2
kids, I will be writing anything education related to them here. My 2nd son is not gifted and this
new chapter into his learning years will be a huge curve ball for me. Luckily, I have some athletic ability myself.)